Taking Off Your Mask



“Strangers stop being strangers once common ground is established. Once common ground is established there leaves room for respect to be earned. Once that respect is earned you soon begin to gain trust. Once trust is established, walls come down. Once walls come down and you’re completely vulnerable that is where love begins to grow. Once love takes over, nothing else is needed.” – Katie Kamara


I came up with the above quote because of a special group of people who have stirred my soul and moved me in ways that I never really knew was possible. We are people from diverse backgrounds who not only attracted each other but are constantly healing each other through sharing, words and gestures. The question that I have been asking myself is “How come this type of sharing doesn’t occur more in the world?” My guess is that people are scared to take off their masks. Furthermore, I think that some people have worn their masks for so long that they think that’s who they really are. What’s up with that?


People wear masks to hide their true identities. Some do it playfully, others do it erotically and some really mask because they want to hide. Everyone masks for different reasons. My favorite mask used to be the smile. Even when I was dying on the inside I still wore a smile because I did not want to have to deal with someone getting in my business. The reasons why I was damaged or felt hurt was no one’s business and I did not want my wounds exposed. However, looking back, if someone had asked to right questions I think that I would have opened up, but I never gave anyone that opportunity because my smile was a beautiful mask that sent the message “All is well”.


Once I began writing The Velvet Rope Wisdom, I discovered that I could see people without their masks, even while they were still on. I could see pain through smiles, raging anger, promiscuity, acting out and anything else they used to protect themselves. I was startled by the fact that so many were running from themselves but the biggest epiphany was when I discovered the reason why I saw their pain so easily; my pain was not healed either. That’s when I started working diligently on identifying my own mask. What was I hiding from? What did I think needed protecting? I got clear that I thought that my pain was unique, no one would understand, I would be judged and treated poorly. Once I dismantled that foolish story I was then able to throw my mask away and simply wear my TRUE smile. As a result I can now support other people with shedding their masks and giving them the access to their own freedom by sharing themselves authentically.


The truth is, everyone wants to love, be loved, acknowledged and appreciated. At some point these things were violated and once that happens people retreat and begin to hide. Many of these things occur when we are children. Children are masters at make believe and hiding things. However, children who mask become adults who mask and before we know it we have all these masks but no real faces. However, trust, respect, and love gives life to people’s true nature. When people feel like they are loved they will strip down, bare and they will tell all. Telling all brings such a freedom and a depth of personal peace that is indescribable. I encourage all of you to drop your masks and embrace yourself before the mask. Heal thyself.

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