I wanna just share some thoughts.
I’m thinking about nagging and how I have been guilty of being a nagger in the past and when nagging wasn’t enough I just got resentful and just did whatever I was asking to be done myself. So what’s the formula to reduce nagging AND stop yourself from growing resentful?
First, make a request of the person. You ask if they are willing to help you out. If they say yes and it’s something that you don’t have a particular due date on, you ask them when would they have it done by? You’re not asking to be a micro manager but you’re asking to hold that person accountable. Third you ask them if they have any questions, concerns, or obstacles that would prevent them from getting that particular thing done at that time. Depending on their answer you work it out accordingly.
Now in the event that they don’t honor their word you have a few options. The first one is to tell them the impact of them breaking their word has on you. You can also ask them to restore integrity by creating a new due date or you can take the project from them and do it yourself, ask someone else to do it or hire someone else to do it. The follow up to this is that if you are constantly at a loss because this person frequently breaks their word, then it's time for the close out conversation. The close out conversation lets this person know that their word is unreliable and as a result the impact on you is anger, frustration, upset and disappointment. It’s up to you to decide how much you’re gonna take from that person. Talk is cheap, watch their actions and see how they operate or let them go and keep it moving.
To be a nagger is to allow yourself to be disrespected. You go back on your self respect when you are literally harassing someone to do something they have no interest in doing. It’s counter-over productive for all parties. Make requests! People who VALUE and RESPECT you will do what you ask as long as it’s reasonable to them and within their power and time frame. The person who just devalues you won’t ever give you due dates, value your time and definitely won’t listen to your nagging, and stand to lose.
What will you choose for you life? What kind of people will you choose for your life? Who will you be in the face of no agreement?